7 Feb 09

Unconditional love. What is it? I've been thinking about that this past week. I realize how conditional and finite my love is. I have realized that I accept people based on their performance over who they are ( a child of God). My love is not really love at all. It carries more of a "how can you benefit me" attitude. Not very loving at all.

I do not understand the concept of unconditional love. I look to Jesus Christ and see His love for me when I didn't deserve it. Love is not earned. It is a gift that is freely given without any expectation. I guess to truly love Jesus back, is to give him what He's given me- life, my life.

Through this past week, I have come to realize more and more of how short I fall in my thoughts, my heart, my actions-- in comparison to how great God is and to His standard. I realize how much I need Jesus' forgiveness. I need Him to change me and fill me with His love.

Unconditional love. Truly, it can only be found through the love of Jesus.

4 Feb

I have decided to not cross train into the Army from the Air Force. I learned that I would have to pay back my bonus if I were to separate and then join the Army. I have looked at what jobs are available in the Air Force and am very interested in the medical career field. There are a few jobs that are appealing to me: ultrasound technician, medic, and orthopedics technician. There are a few jobs that also interest me: paralegal, weather man, flight engineer, and possibly flight attendant. I hope I can have a job I can use in the civilian world and make a good living.

Tonight, my wife kicked my butt at "Settlers of Catan" two games out of three. I was trying my new strategy "operation anaconda" (Ulysses S. Grant's idea during the Civil War to cut off supplies to the Confederate Army). It finally worked in the third game. I built a road in the shape of a half circle around her and blocked off her access to build new settlements. It was a fun game. I'm glad that my wife and I have spent quality time the past three nights.

31 Jan

My wife and I bought the movie "Fireproof" last night. We had a good time watching the movie. It brought up good discussion between us. I am realizing how my wife and I communicate with one another. We think and process things differently. I realize that I need to communicate more with my wife and let her know what I'm really thinking/feeling. This is very abnormal and uncomfortable for me but I think it will definitely improve our communication.

29 Jan

Tonight was a very fun and interesting night. The C's, P's, and we had a show down at the Settlers of Catan (knights/expansion) game. It went all the way past midnight and was filled with suspense from the very beginning. I was in the lead with the longest road until Joy built a road around the outskirts to take the "longest road" award. I was determined to get it back and was able to at the last round. I was shy of winning by one point. Victor went immediately after my turn and won the game. I can finally say I am Catanned-out. What an addicting game!

21 Jan

We had Scott and Joy over for dinner tonight. We played Settlers of Catan and I won the first game! yeah baby, feel the thunder! lol. We played a second game and everyone seemed to be playing the game "whatever you do, don't let Steve win" game.

Scott had a great starting position on wood, brick, and ore. He put a city on that spot in the very beginning of the game. He was on his way to win because he also had the longest road. I stopped his attempt on my second defensive attempt. I built the longest road, but it cost me the game (no way I was going to win) because I made the longest road in a circle right around the desert! Joy ended up winning and it was a good night.

20 Jan 09

I've been thinking about cross-training in the Army from the Air Force. It would be awesome if I could stay here in Clarksville, TN. If I re-train in the Air Force I'll be sure to move.

I've been praying about this over the weekend. This morning I went on a run to think it over and pray. I met a friend from church and we ran together. His input was insightful and stressed that God can use us anywhere we are. Later in the morning, I talked with my Chief. He stressed that we're used to being comfortable where we are but God might want us to be somewhere else because he needs us or someone else needs us elsewhere. I met a friend at lunch and said a similar thing as well.

I think God answered my prayer through three different people today. I'm not cross-training into the Army. I will do my best to re-train into a different job in the Air Force.

18 Jan 09

I had a great time playing flag football today. There were 26 people playing and more than half of them were new guys. My friend, Mike, and I were the only Asians there. We were captains and I got first pick. We were losing 0-4. We finally got our first touch down about 30 minutes into the game. Then we scored again to make it 2-4. Something happened about 15 minutes after that to where we were forcing them to make lots of mistakes. One hour passed and the score was tied up. Something crazy happened at this point. We went on a streak to make the score 6-4- my team in the lead. We scored another point to make it 7-4. They scored two points to make it 7-6. We got back in the game and finished it with 9-6. This was the best game I was a part of. Everyone had fun and was playing their hearts out. My friends and I were also able to invite some people to Bible Study Thursday night. I hope to see the same people out there next Sunday.